6x20 thoughts

Can we just talk about Il Tavolo Biancos for a minute?
I was fuming after this episode. I started off really hopeful because of the preview. You know, that scene where he's on her porch... and they only give you a glimpse, and you think it's just them? I have been dreaming about him standing on her porch for years. Okay, before I get riled up, I'm going to backtrack a minute here.
I just have to say that I absolutely adore Abbott. At first, I really hated him. Like, really? Just leave Jane alone! But now, with him being a fellow Shipper and all... well, I've been attached for awhile, but this sold it for me. His comment to Jane: "How much longer are you gonna let that get away?" HELLO, I'VE BEEN ASKING THIS FOR YEARS. Abbott is just what I needed - an expression of the Ship in the show. Bless you, Heller, but only to an extent. Furthermore, when he paid for them to go to dinner? Um, hello, I'll pay for that dinner. Heck, I'll pay for them to get a hotel for the night. "How was dinner with Lisbon?" Abbott asked. Jane's response was about the food. HA! Not what he was asking about, honey.

Jane and Lisbon's conversation before dinner was really painful. I was hopeful for a minute there, but of course not. When he asked: "What does a girl want to hear?" And her reply, "I wish I knew." I thought, obviously she wants you to tell her how you really feel - you can see on her face that she just wants him to say it. She's so tired of following him blindly. He needs to show some real commitment! Jane is just so broken. He honestly doesn't know how to open up. In speculation - if we were to get a Season 7 *says silent prayer* - I think a lot of it could delve into how Jane is going to fix himself. He's trying to put himself back together, but he's too broken to know how. With Lisbon's help (and through their relationship, obviously), I think he could bring himself 'back from the dead,' in a sense. I just have a lot of pity and love for Patrick Jane.
The end of the episode was BY FAR the worst. That was what made me hate the episode, even though I've really hated these last few episodes with Pike. Jane is such a third wheel, it's painful to the point that I cry for him. I literally cry. You think I'm joking, but I'm really not.
Here are my thoughts on the end of the episode: he was GOING TO TELL HER. He brought enough food for two - "There's enough for Marcus in there too" - he plucked up the freaking courage to knock on the door, even though he was hesitant and clearly nervous about it, and the way his smile fades when Pike opens the door is heart-shattering. But guys, HE WAS GOING TO TELL HER HOW HE FELT. PIKE RUINED IT.
Long story short, I was crying at the end. SO, CLOSE, yet so, so very far... sometimes it feels like it's never going to happen and my soul despairs in the icy depths of hell.